My client was miserable. He came to me because he had to “Get Out!!” of an oppressive, frustrating, stressful, hostile marriage. He couldn’t believe what he thought was The One had morphed into The Wrong One. It only took a year to tell the truth. It was hard, the truth-telling part. He wanted the marriage to succeed, and worked diligently to “make it work”: healthy boundaries, straight-talk; empathy, managing expectations, understanding their different temperaments, changing his language, active listening, sexy-weekends that weren’t, couples counseling (not with me). Nothing worked. He even got a dog. Misery prevailed.
He got out. The expensive divorce left both he and his now former wife exhausted, and relieved.
Quickly he found himself in another relationship with a woman who was very similar to his ex, but of course, without all the flaws.
My client is smart, and prides himself on not repeating mistakes. He paid attention to his fresh inner red-flags, picked up the phone, scheduled a few sessions, and learned something about Feminine Power.
We agreed together that unconscious patterns run our lives until we make them conscious; only then do we have real choice. As he looked in the rear-view mirror reflecting on his courtship he acknowledged that he had ignored his inner signals as they rushed to the altar. Each denied small alert compounded into The Big Mistake.
But, it was only when he relived his wedding day that he had an “ah-ha” moment.
He told me that he “knew” when he woke up that morning that he was making a mistake. He just knew. He knew, too, that the gnawing in his gut wasn’t just the jitters; but he marched down the aisle anyway, regretting every step.
Feminine power has many forms, including intuition. It is one of our most valuable and undervalued resources. Paying attention to our “gut feeling” when making decisions will lead us towards choices that enhance rather than diminish life.
My client could have avoided misery for himself, his former wife, and of course, the dog had he been taught to pay attention to is intuitive signals. He’s doing that today with his new lover, and when flags arise, he listens, and then works out the issues they signal in his new relationship before another serious mistake is made.
He’s freer, happier, and making choices that not only enhance his relationship, but in all areas of his life.
We use our sight, hearing, sense, taste, touch to navigate our world. The more abstract but nevertheless equally important navigation system is our intuition.
There is only one tip to offer:
Include your intuition into your decision-making. Practice valuing your gut-feelings equally with the other input that you are more familiar with until you learn to trust it. Just ask: “how do I feel” and allow the uncensored response to come into consciousness. Only then can you make the best choices, avoid costly mistakes, and be kinder to dogs.
Summer Workshop on Feminine Power - LA BAY AREA AUTHENTIC WOMEN: May 1, July 17, 2016
Contact Marsha @ (818)782-8533 or email:
or Amelia: firstname.lastname@example.org
for additional information about workshops.
Call or email Marsha directly to schedule a personal